Death and all his friends..

Saturday, June 06, 2009 |

I don't know why, but it seems that I can only blog at nighttime. Thats when my creative juices REALLY get flowing. Or I'm too tired to work, but not enough to go to sleep, so somewhere in the middle is where I feel like writing. Typing. Whatever.


An interesting day today... Hmm. Did some biology revision, some chemistry, almost finished chemistry but didn't quite make it, had Danish people over to stay and to entertain by myself... eek. Parents out at some Hampton Court Palace soiree, walked the dog, got hit by a bee in the eye, and what else... oh yeah. I saw a man die.

I was on MSN talking to a few friends, and one of them sent me a link to a video, and told me to watch it. When I clicked on the link I saw '18+' and instantly covered the video with the messenger screen, wondering if I actually wanted to watch the video at risk of scarring myself for life.. too late. I then clicked back on the other screen to close it before anything could happen, but then I saw a man, walking on top of a train, reach out for an electric wire overhanging the train and get highly electrocuted. I actually jumped - honestly it's the most horrendous thing I've ever seen. You see all these stunts that people do in movies and on youtube, but this was the real thing, and I've never been so.. horrified in my life. The man suddenly... the best way to describe it is 'exploded'. And his body caught fire. Twice he exploded - two big booming noises, and two body wrenching moments, then the smoke cleared, and you saw his body just topple onto the top of the train, his limbs splayed over the side of the train. His body was still smoking, and his hair then caught alight - people were shouting and running away from the train. This was no stunt. A man died, in a terribly horrific way. Some of you may just think it's no big deal, and that I should just get over myself, but honestly, that scarred me for life. Seeing an actual death is so much more of a deal than just hearing about someone dying - an incredibly.. 'humbling' experience. The best way I can put it. Death is as much a part of life as being born and living is, but to go in such a way as this...

There are honestly no words to describe this, but if you want to look at this video for yourself.. although you HAVE been warned, it's graphic, and not at all pleasant to watch. If you're insanely curious, and still mad enough, then click here.

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On Nothing and Everything,

Thursday, June 04, 2009 |

I could see the moon, in its full glory, if I moved a little bit to the left. This beautiful luminescent presence in the sky, now appearing around midday, invading the sky and stealing time from the Sun... glorious night. Beautiful night. Nights so dark, with a thousand shimmering stars, like specks of glitter on a page. And heat, heat unbearable, so much so you could camp out under these stars, the sky as your blanket. Counting constellations, no worries in the world. Feeling soft nothing under you. Time is irrelevant, a concept, seemingly non-existent at this time. For now, it is you, and only you. No one else. Nothing else. Nothing matters. Everything is right. I'm calm, I have peace, I close my eyes. Flickering dots and swirls of nothing - a black abyss of shape. You've nothing to fear, nothing can happen now. You're safe. You're untouchable. You can be what you want to be - say what you want to say, shout out loud, share your anger and express your rage to the dark skies above. In the empty fullness. No one will hear you - no one will ever know. How you felt, in this moment.

Mist creeps in around the early hours of the morning, when dawn breaks. The signal for a new day, a fresh start, possibilities plenty. You alone have the choice - make something of yourself, achieve something worthwhile, let yourself go, procrastinate a few hours more. You know you want to. You probably deserve it. But for now, you can't. And you won't let yourself do this, again. Only a fool makes the same mistake twice - is that not what's been instilled in us, since we were young?

So for now, work. Work hard. Nothing else exists - you, your work, your own little microcosm of a world. Push yourself to limits you may have never reached before. And then just wait. Wait until night time comes. The moon, bringer of deliverance from tiredness, rest from demands, healing from hurts, has yet to rise another day.

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The Age of Chivalry isn't Dead...

Wednesday, June 03, 2009 |

Earlier today, while I was on the bus coming home, I was waiting at traffic lights and happened to notice a man sitting down on the pavement opposite us. An English man, he looked to be in his early 30s or so, and was bent over, cradling his leg. I then saw a passer by, a black man, stop and ask him if he was okay. He then responded by saying something (I couldn't tell what - I'm not the greatest lip reader..) and pointing to his leg. I could see now that his trousers were torn, and his leg was bleeding quite a lot. The passer by then unzipped his rucksack, took out a tissue, and handed it to the poor man on the floor. The man then thanked him, and the passer by stayed with him a while. Later, he then patted him on the back, and went on his way. Shortly afterwards, the man hesitantly got up on his feet after tending to his wound, and started to pick his bag up.


Then, I noticed a man, in the car in front of the bus, shouting something to this poor guy who injured himself. As the traffic lights turned green, the man in the car made a U-turn and pulled up onto the pavement, next to where the other man was standing. He then said something to the man, who picked up his bag and got into the car. End of story. And all this happened while the bus was waiting at a traffic light.

The fact that both men who helped this poor guy were complete strangers to him, just made me go "awwh" inside... Its nice that society still looks out for each other. That our sense of social responsibility still stands, even now, in times when it's harder to trust a complete stranger. That being said, the man who offered the guy a lift could have been an axe-wielding homosexual rapist.. but somehow, I doubt it.
Plus, rapists don't own expensive flashy cars.


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